In between buying roses, shopping for a red dress, making dinner reservations for two, googling ‘V-Day ideas to surprise the significant other’, or moping that you’re single, planning to get drunk with your other single girlfriends, writing hate mails to the ex’s, buying giant tubs of ice creams, drinking rampant shots at the club, did you forget to fall in love with yourself?
I wanted to write about something different for you all.. Instead of showing you the obvious fashion blogger’s ‘5 Ways to Style a Red Dress’ or ‘3 Outfits to flaunt at that V-Day Dinner’, I’m going to take you on a slightly different route.
For the past couple of years, the crowd is tilting away from the thought of making it all about lovers and leaning into the idea of celebrating affection towards ‘loved ones’ in general. The loved ones might consist of friends and family. While I admire this thought and believe that if we love someone our actions should reflect it all year round, I, however have a problem. I have a problem with how the concept of ‘loved ones’, does not include ourselves.
Very simply put, I urge you to fall in love, cherish and spend time with yourself.
This year I had a bit of an epiphany that mental well-being is as important as the physical one. And as much as we’d like to find the solutions to our dilemmas in other people, the answer is always within ourselves. This is mainly because nobody knows and understands you like you do. We are so busy running from plans to goals, targets to milestones that we forget to adore the person that our souls came wrapped in.
I had been meaning to visit a bookstore for the longest time but never got around to it. Until today. I spent hours sitting on the floor, shuffling through some classics, flipping through a few steamy pages of Mills and Boons, re-reading blunt poetry by Bukowski and even having a few giggles in between the shelves, with Calvin and Hobbes. Bookstores are my happy place and all I needed now was a cup of coffee. So, I stepped out and grabbed myself one.
And, while I sat in the coffee-shop digging into a warm slice of banana-walnut cake, it hit me: I love spending time with myself. But somehow I never pursued this for the fear of being dismissed as a loner.
Now, as I write this piece it’s finally sinking in that I have overlooked loving myself for way too long. And so have you.
So, this Valentine’s Day, take yourself out on a date, whether its a quiet bookstore visit, a coffee catch-up or a pizza date for one. Also, do all of this without feeling pity for yourself or craving company.
You have yourself and that is plenty. Give yourself a chance to fall back in love, with you.
Happy Valentine’s Day, everybody.
Thanks for reading.
Shot by Jithin Jose
Location courtesy Blossoms Bookstore and The White Room, Bangalore